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And while we’d go out to shows and bars together, we agreed that we'd hang just as friends. He’d sing me Johnny Cash songs in a thick southern accent.He hung all of the shelves in my apartment, cooked me chicken and dumplings from scratch, and, real talk, was some of the best sex I’ve ever had. One day, Will told me that he’d met someone he was interested in pursuing seriously, but that he’d end things with her if I wanted to take our relationship to the next level.His name was Will*, and he was a theater actor with a side hustle as a carpenter, and a slight Texan drawl. We immediately bonded over our love of cheap beer, theater, and Johnny Cash.For the next five hours, the booze flowed; we moved to another bar, split a plate of nachos, and then drunkenly fell into a cab together back to my apartment.And yet I’d still willingly fall into flings with these guys. One Friday night, I’d double-booked myself on two dates.After about a half-dozen such romances, I’d finally had enough. I was meant to have early drinks with bachelor number one, followed by a casual cocktails-and-appetizers date with bachelor number two.As much as I liked Will, I knew that there were a lot of ways in which we’d never work as a couple.

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But, like Maya Angelou said, “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” If someone you're interested in says they just want casual sex, believe them.It was my first experience with casual sex like that — and I was surprised by how into it I was.After my usual pattern had failed to land me a rom-com boyfriend, I’d decided to go in the opposite direction by taking a dating hiatus.Now I know I can reach out to him when I need something, be it help spackling a hole in the wall or an orgasm.Will showed me who he was from the beginning — a funny guy I felt comfortable with who made delicious chicken and dumplings. After being raised on a steady diet of Disney movies, I expected to meet someone and fall passionately in love — but wound up collapsing under the pressures of modern dating.




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